Tuesday, March 3, 2009

This is a good post..You know you wanna read it!!! (and Comment!!)

I have lots and lots of stories for this post!!! Most of them will probably bore you but who knows maybe you'll get a few giggles out of it.

So first of all, a few months ago I was ironing a skirt when something tragic happened. You see I don't have an ironing board in my room so when I iron I have to do it on my bed. Well anyways I was ironing away when I smelled something burning. When I lefted up the iron I found a huge burn mark on my bed sheets. For some reason I thought if I washed the sheets the mark would go away but alas it did not. So for the past few months I've had to look at my ugly charred sheets that have a burn mark resembling a skid mark. Do you know what a skid mark is. In case you have been living in a box your whole life I will inform you. A skid mark is something you get in your undies when you suck at whiping. They are most commonly found in my dad's briefs. Bahaha you probly didn't need to know that but anyways...so last night I was at Walmart with Mr. Amazing and found some new sheets. They were on sale for a really cheap price and they were dark green. Not only would they match the comforter I have now but if I should ever leave the iron on my bed again it won't leave a mark. So I skipped all the way up to the register excited about my new sheets. I reached in my purse to pull out my wallet and couldn't find it! Earlier last night I had been paying for something online and forgot to return my wallet to its happy little home known as my purse. Luckily I had Mr. Amazing with me and he ran to the rescue to grab his wallet. He threw me the wallet and my (not-so) excellent hand-eye coordination skills kicked in and I caught the wallet easy peasy. The older couple in front of my looked in awe an asked if I played ball. Well of course I do!! (Just not with my hands) I chuckled and informed them that I had absolutely no hand-eye coordination but they persisted by telling me I should take it up. When the turned around I rolled my eyes..PSSHHHHH SOCCER IS BOMB WHY WOULD I WANT TO PLAY ANYTHING ELSE!?!?! Anyways...

This morning I woke up ridiculously early because I'm still carpooling with my family due to Lackofcaritis! (That's the terribly awful case of not having a car for a week) When I got home I decided school was for losers and I would stay home. Oh stop rolling your eyes. I only had one class today and I have an A++++ in there so there. Anyways I stayed home and did laundry and junk so it wasn't that exciting. Then I headed off to work. Oh the joys of work. Ugh. I was talking to a co-worker when she informed me that another co-worker (let's just call him Stu) wasn't talking to her because she called Stu a FLOOZY! HAHAHA I could not stop laughing because it is so true..Stu is a floozy in dude form. Later Stu came up to me to tell me about his new nickname when I started laughing. He got all pissy and asked why it was so funny. I said..Stu you are such a floozy! Stu gasped in shock and said (direct quote) "I'm not a floozy!! I've only kissed 13 girls in one year!!!" Oh my heck Stu that totally qualifies as being a floozy. It took me 4 years to get to my number of 13!! He tied my in just one. What the heck. But this totally proved my point that Stu is a giant floozy.

After that I was given the one bit of power I have at DI: The Store Phone. This is the phone that all the annoying customers call to ask stupid questions like "Do you have refrigeraters. Not regular ones, just tiny ones." So everytime I get the store phone it stays silent for hours without one phone call. Then I decided its safe to run to the bathroom. I'm not kidding you every time I go to the bathroom the phone rings. I hate answering the phone in the bathroom because there's an echo and EVERYONE knows your in the bathroom talking on the phone. So anyways, today I went to the bathroom and on my way there I saw this sign saying ***$25 reward for whoever catches and gets rid of the cat hiding in production*** I pretty much disregarded the sign because my urge to piddle was greater than the desire FOR A WHOLE $25!!! Well anyways I'm sitting in the stall outsmarting the phone (sitting in the stall but not actually going so when the phone rings I can make a quick exit and then go back to finishing my bathroom buisiness). Of course the phone rings so I quickly exited and answered the phone.

Me: Thank you for calling Deserest Industries, this is Alix, How may I help you?
Caller: Yes what time do you close?
Me: 9 o clock ma'am.
Caller: Ok I'm just calling to confirm that the cat trap Tabitha ordered will be here tonight.
END OF CALL

K by now most people know that due to my mom's insane love for cats I'm not a big fan..BUT COME ON! Tabitha you are a whore. You ordered a cat trap! That sounds horrible. Seriously think of all the traps possible..none of them end great for the animal..mouse traps, rat traps, ant traps, bear traps!!! My word. And DI is supposed to be a place of church goers. I'm ashamed to be associated with a place that would turn to cat traps! Plus why would you post reward signs if your just gonna use a cat trap!

In other news I get my car back tomorrow! Totally exciting. Also I mailed in my tax forms and my stuff for Dixie so I should get money and hopefully an acceptance letter very soon! Mr. Amazing needs to send in his stuff otherwise the 2 of us will not be going anywhere! So sad.

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